convenience

Does anyone ever feel like they're the convenience friend? You know, "I-had-plans-with-someone-else-but-they-bailed-so-let's-do-something", or the "I'm-just-really-busy-I-only-care-about-your-problems-in-my-free-time", or "I've-got-nothing-better-to-do". Sound familiar? If not you're lucky. But if you're like me, there's about a thousand more.

I am the convenience friend by profession. It's a job I never signed up for, but if it was a paid position, I would own an island in the Caribbean by now. Sometimes it's easy to deny- they're just busy! It's okay, you know deep down they care about you. They're going through a lot right now. But tonight, I've had a breakthrough... ready?

SCREW THAT. Real friends care, no matter how busy they are. Real friends make time, instead of just waiting for me to. This has been a terrible week- on the list of my top 10 worst weeks ever. And I have been blown off and ignored and "re-scheduled" too many times to count. I am over this- this is my official resignation from the position of convenience friend. I'm over having my heart broken.

i broke

My life has been so insane lately.

Last weekend, I had the opportunity to go on a retreat with my school... I think I was initially excited, but as it drew closer, excitement turned to dread. I won't get into the nitty gritty, but it turned out to be wonderful. It has been years since I went on a retreat as a participant and not a leader, and I think I needed that. Bottom line, I didn't have any lightning bolts of divine inspiration but I did come out with a little tip from God- He's got a plan. So all of the worrying and stressing I do is pointless. I need to just let go and lean on Him.

About 45 minutes after arriving home, I fell and broke a finger on my right hand. Now I have to depend on others for a lot of things I can usually do by myself. My life is not my own.

I'm not sure I was looking for such a literal emphasis, but point taken!

You Are Here

I am being torn in about 15 different directions. Different people, different places, different paths. I have no idea which path is the correct path, or if there is even such a thing as a Correct Path. Perhaps I'll be like Emerson, and decide in 50 years that I would've ended up in the same place no matter what. Or maybe I'll never figure it out. Am I condemned to a life of "What If's"?

I am scared. Actual, can't-sleep-because-I-am-outlining-every-possible-worst-case-scenario-in-my-sad-little-mind terrified.

I have been in school for as long as I can remember. It is all I've ever known, all I've ever done. Now, I graduate college in two months. And what's next? More school? Most likely. But where? For what? Which degree? Which city? Which job?

I'm surprised my brain hasn't yet exploded. It's surely only a matter of time.

what you put up with, you end up with.

I am in NO WAY taking credit for the following post. But I read it today, and it really hit home. I do these "I'm-changing-now-really-I-am" posts all the time. Obviously, I either have no will-power or I have a lot wrong with my life... I tend to think it's both! Regardless, here goes nothing.

"It is very easy to blame other people for what’s wrong in your life. But in every circumstance, other people are never to blame. Any relationship you’ve ever been in, you’ve chosen to be in. Every action you’ve taken in every moment of your life was a choice that you made.

This is what is meant by “you are 100% responsible for your life”. For you to grow, for life to open even more, for magic to happen, you must raise your standards. The things you “should” get around to, have to become the things you “must” do.

Anyone who is a high achiever is not a procrastinator. They act, and they act now. Take action with your greatest life in mind. Constantly work on yourself and do not be afraid to let go of people who no longer serve your happiness.

Surround yourself with people who love and support you and who you love to love and support. Act from the place of knowing you are worth all the love, success and happiness that you can squeeze out of life. Hold yourself to a standard of excellence that you’ve always known SHOULD be yours, this is not a dress rehearsal.

The Uni-verse is a direct mirror of your self-worth, self-love and willingness to grow. Look around – what do you see? If you’re life isn’t constantly expanding & growing, if you aren’t constantly stepping outside your comfort zone – ask yourself – what are you waiting for? We are about to enter a new year and a new DECADE.

As Tony Robbins says, “You will certainly arrive 10 years from now; the question is where and with whom?”.

Where do you want to be when this decade is over? Imagine another 10 years of the same bad habits! Is that who you really are? Is that the kind of life you really want? I don’t think so.

Remember - what you put up with, you end up with. The time is now to only have the best in your life. You are worth it. Decide now."

Source: TheDailyLove.com